True Blizzard of Oz

So this joke is simply to easy to be made up.

Seems Ozzy Osbourne, the Prince of F#$^%&* Darkness himself has been tapped to pen an autobiography. But there's just one hiccup. Seems the metal maven's got a case of a drug and alcohol induced amnesia.

Can't imagine why ...

The Black Sabbath rocker signed a 1 million pound book deal with publishers Little Brown early last year, but so far he has not written any of it.

A source revealed: "I cannot imagine the book being ready in five months, because so far Ozzy hasn't written anything - he hasn't even got a ghostwriter yet. So it is going to be some time before the book actually appears, if it ever does."

"My memory isn't what it used to be because of the drugs and alcohol I've been living on for the best part of my adult life," Ozzy told a British tabloid. "I often get asked, 'Is it true you snorted a line of ants?' Knowing me, there's a very good possibility. But do I remember it? No way."

Since Ozzy signed the deal his wife Sharon has written and published two books of her own.